


Dress My Wings

by Kanami



Category: Digibirds
Genre: Alternate Universe - Fusion, Bittersweet Ending, Cussing, Drunken Flirting, Gender or Sex Swap, Homophobia, Idols, Inspired by Music, Inspired by Roleplay/Roleplay Adaptation, Multi, Racism, Romantic Angst, Sexual Confusion, Students, To Be Continued, Virtual Reality
Language: English
Status: In-Progress
Published: 2015-12-03
Updated: 2016-02-19
Packaged: 2019-02-14 00:04:28
Rating: Mature
Warnings: No Archive Warnings Apply
Chapters: 5
Words: 6,711
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/12995448
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/Kanami/pseuds/Kanami
Summary: Anjali "Mizuki" Sethi wanted to finish university, leave Cyberverse to enter the Real World, and fangirl over the famous songster Fireworks while she's at it. She steers clear of Digibirds besides concerts because if anyone finds a Limited Idol Digital Companion, there goes your chance at a normal life. One Christmas concert with a weird ending, one mysterious package with a note later, and Anjali is no longer herself anymore. Welcome to the Tweet Life, Twilight!





	1. Chapter 1

**Author's Note:**

> SONG ORDER  
> Fireworks, “Ray of Light” - Madonna  
> Fireworks, “Jump” - Madonna  
> Twilight, “Rush” - Aly & AJ  
> Fairytale, “Feel the Light” - Jennifer Lopez  
> Sparkling Dreamer, “A Sky Full of Stars” - Coldplay  
> Stargazer, “Will You Be There” - Skillet  
> Songfeather, “Canto Alla Vita” [English translation] - Josh Groban & The Corrs  
> Gems, “Fly” - Céline Dion

**Digibirds! The newest craze sweeping North America, electronic toy budgies with the potential to shine with their songs and sparkling personalities! Will YOU be the lucky person to own a Limited Idol Digital Companion (LIDC), and venture into Cyberverse and live the Tweet Life? Grab yourself a cute little Digibird and find out! One Digibird per person only!**

Hey. My name's Anjali Sethi, and let me tell you that although these fake budgies sound wicked awesome, I’m really scared of getting a LIDC. I've lost bird after bird (real ones, mind you) and I'm no idol. See, the LIDCs allow you to merge with your Digibird into Cyberverse and literally become a virtual singer. Then again there's only one LIDC per Digibird model, so the chances are slim. Still, I'm terrified, so I never bought one. Because if you buy one, bye-bye goes your old life. You're forced to be a diva.

Everything's done online these days, only the Old People (my term for everyone out of school) are allowed out of the house and do real work. That's right, we young adults have been cooped up since birth in order to learn the intricacies of Cyberverse, learning of the outside world through stories and simulations.

Fuck, I'm in the last year of my HBA, and I just want to get out into the real world already - but everyone's pushing me to do a masters, then a doctorate, and probably postdoctoral work while they're at it. Can't I have a real life already? Like actually MEET people and do something useful with my education? Oh look, it's Lulu messaging me.

 **Lulu:** Hey honey, you won’t believe what I got in the mail!  
**Mizuki:** A frakking Digibird?

Oh right, Mizuki is my screenname. I named myself after the once top idol in that show I love, _Aikatsu!_ You know, I've never met Lulu. God knows she could be a he creeping on me. But Lulu's been my best friend since forever, you'd think I'd know by now. She's totally and completely awesome.

 **Lulu:** Miss Lady, you swear too much, you know? Anyway, no, but I got tickets to Fireworks' concert!  
**Mizuki:** ...my one weakness. Fuck you. YOU DAMNED BITCH.  
**Lulu:** Tsk tsk, is that any way to thank your bestie? VIP seating  
**Mizuki:** OMG SQUEE! NO WAY HOW THE FUCK DID YOU MANAGE THAT?  
**Lulu:** Jeebus, it's only nearly Christmas! My gift to you! So you gonna come or what, Mizuki?  
**Mizuki:** You do realize that these things are virtual and I'll probably be drooling over a 40 year old virgin in a fake hot body.  
**Lulu:** Sweet. I'm registering us right now. Ciao hun, try not to burn in hell too much.

Lulu is a godsend. Anything bad I said about Lulu can go die in a fire. She is sweetness and goodness and sugar and candies and rainbow shitting unicorns and okay shutting up now.

 **Mizuki:** Hey Lulu? How do you pronounce LIDC anyway? You getting a Digibird after Fireworks’ concert?  
**Lulu:** Girl that's easy. Le Dick.  
**Mizuki:** WTF?  
**Lulu:** /blows you a kiss/ See you later, sweetheart!

It's a few days to Fireworks' concert. I, amongst other thousands of fangirls, are probably drooling in our sleep. Clearly Lulu has something on her mind. Ahem. I try to sleep, but all I hear in my head are the songs I've listened to so far. Apparently the LIDCs are a new thing, because there's only one other Cyberverse singer besides Fireworks, and that's Bella.

Sorry. THE Bella. But she kinda flew the coop a while back. Legend goes that she trained Fireworks, and after he became super famous, she vanished. Rumour has it that she's behind the LIDCs. A comeback in a subtle way, maybe? How do regular people learn to be idols anyway? Voice lessons? Hahaha as if I could hold a tune. Lulu's so going to buy a Digibird as a souvenir, I know she will. I think I'll save my cash. I'll have a massive student loan to pay off anyway.

Concert night! I did all my homework, logged enough hours for the week in the online learning environment, and now I'm going to kick back, relax, and not get too excited over a certain musician. Yeah. That's the plan. This is insane like the Vocaloid craze of how many years ago, except that I know there's a real person behind that dark purple hair and sky blue eyes. Before inputting the URL of the VIP section, I briefly skim over the Digibirds website. Hey, some of these are adorable. I could maybe - no. If I get a Le Dick, there goes my life. I'm no songstress. The one that catches my eye the most is the Twilight model. I stared at her for a while, and then at Apollo, figuring they were probably a pair. Twilight is celestial themed, all dark blues and gold and silver. Her wings are dressed in stars and a crescent moon on each side, head capped in silver and black eyes outlined in gold.

"She's pretty," I say wistfully to myself.

 **Lulu:** Do I hear Mizuki squeeing over a Digibird? XD  
**Mizuki:** I'm allowed to admire.  
**Lulu:** I thought you'd want a Fireworks model.  
**Mizuki:** Why the hell would I want Fireworks - oh.

There's already a LIDC Fireworks, meaning if I got one of my idol, there's no chance I'd be forced into the Tweet Life. And I'd have a memento. Hm. And a cute little budgie that won't die as long as I feed it lithium ion batteries. Oh and Lulu can't actually HEAR me, there's something called dictation software.

I pull up Fireworks' page. It's a slick purple with black, and a blue starburst on each wing. The eye pattern is interesting - Twilight's eye looks like a black orb with a sunburst, but Fireworks has a starry wing thing going on. I also noticed that Twilight has a cage while Fireworks doesn't. Is that significant? Something tells me it is, but I brush that bullshit off. Twilight might be a newer model, who knows. Some kids like birds in a cage. Humans made cages for birds, after all.

It makes me a little sad. Beautiful Twilight in a cage. I shake my head, fuck that shit. She's a toy. A TOY. Toys have no feelings. Only imagination infuses them with those, and even then, it's a construct, not fact.

 **Lulu:** Mizuki! Cyberverse to Mizuki! Fireworks is about to soar!  
**Mizuki:** OH SHIT I'm logging in I'm logging in!

**FIREWORKS! FIREWORKS! LIVE IT UP, FOLKS, HERE'S THE FAMOUS VIRTUAL SONGSTER, FIREWORKS!**

"OH MY GOD!" I squeal, a shadow of myself in the crowd flapping her arms like mad. "I don't believe this shit!" The crowd goes wild, and Fireworks launches into song, his tenor rising and echoing both naturally and enhanced by Cyberverse.

_Zephyr in the sky at night I wonder_  
_Do my tears of mourning sink beneath the sun_  
_She's got herself a universe gone quickly_  
_For the call of thunder threatens everyone_

I pay little attention to the words. It's the sound that appeals to me best. He could be singing crap for all I care, I just love that voice and that slick dancing. Although something’s tugging at me, like I should listen more carefully. I completely missed the second verse!

_And I feel_  
_Quicker than a ray of light_  
_Then gone for_  
_Someone else shall be there_  
_Through the endless years_

Somehow, I think this song isn't quite so happy happy joy joy as the sound suggests. Lulu's just a shadow next to me, I can't make out her details just like she can't make out mine. We just know who the other is by the usernames posted above our shadowed heads. But it's like nobody is paying as close attention as I am, everyone's dancing and screaming their voices hoarse.

Then the song's over, and Fireworks breaks into a grin and waves at the crowd. Cheers erupt and roll through the virtual stadium like a pyroclastic cloud bursting from a volcano. Fireworks shifts into Digibird form, shaking his head and chirping at us as he takes off into the brightly lit night. A message flashes across my screen as the stadium fades out.

**Hello, Mizuki! Thank you for enjoying my performance of _Ray of Light!_ In celebration, the Twilight model is being released tonight. Among the orders is hidden a LIDC, will you be the lucky one?**

Bullshit. It's a generic message sent to the spectators with our usernames in it, as if we're supposed to believe that the spectacular Fireworks really sent us a message. But, Twilight's being released? I want I want, but I'm so scared I'll get a LIDC. Then came a shock to my senses.

 ** **Fireworks:** ** Seriously, "Mizuki?" What are you, a little Japanese fangirl in the GTA? Or do you just like foreign names? Are you even a girl?

No way. FIREWORKS MESSAGED ME?

 ** **Mizuki:** ** Uh - yes, I am female, and I'm in university. :P  
****Fireworks:** ** Haha. Cool. See you around, "Mizuki."  
****Mizuki:** ** What?

He never replied that night. I have a bad feeling about this. A really bad feeling.


	2. Chapter 2

I don’t believe this shit. I got a package in the mail, a very suspicious looking package because it has a stamp bearing the Digibirds logo on it. I refuse to open it, and message Lulu.

**Mizuki:** Luluuuuuuuu! LULU MY LOVE WHERE THE FUCK ARE YOU

An HOUR later.

**Lulu:** Dawww cutie thanks for waking me. What’s up?  
**Mizuki:** Why the hell do you take an entire hour to get ready?  
**Lulu:** I got my souvenir! Did you buy a Fireworks? I’ve been admiring my new Fairytale.  
**Mizuki:** Fairytale? I thought you’d want a more sassy bird.  
**Lulu:** There’s a lot you don’t know about me, Mizuki.

Okay that was just a little creepy. Lulu’s my best friend. Don’t I know her really well?

**Mizuki:** Uh, I got a package just now.  
**Lulu:** You did buy a Fireworks! Not as great as the real thing, but hey, at least you can kiss it at night. ;)  
**Mizuki:** ... In all seriousness, I didn’t buy a bird. I don’t know why I got one.  
**Lulu:** Hmm. You sure you didn’t accidentally click on the Twilight promotion?  
**Mizuki:** Pretty damned sure. But I got a message from Fireworks.  
**Lulu:** Uh, girl, you do know EVERYONE gets that generic text lol it’s just a dumb ad.  
**Mizuki:** You don’t understand. I got a text. An actual short conversation between us. Or maybe it’s some jackass who has that username.  
**Lulu:** E-mail me that NOW.

I send that e-mail.

**Lulu:** Um. Well, we did get VIP tickets. Rude.  
**Mizuki:** wtf!  
**Lulu:** It’s legit Fireworks, honey. There aren’t duplicate usernames in Cyberverse. You know that. Did you have to tell him your sex and general age?  
**Mizuki:** I wasn’t thinking. I just wanted to shove a stick up his ass.  
**Lulu:** A very cute ass.  
**Mizuki:** A very rude ass. Still hot though. Anyway. I have work to do and this package needs opening. See you later.  
**Lulu:** Mm-hm. See you.

I log on to do my hours for the day, and by the time evening sets in, I’m starving. The ‘rents aren’t home yet as usual - they’re out in the Real World all day and return home at night. Wouldn’t that be nice? To be away from Cyberverse unless you wanted to be there, to know the world outside. We don’t even have windows - my family’s too poor for fancy glass windows. We survive on air conditioning and the furnace.

I try not to make too many demands on my mom and dad. Just give me food, a warm place, a bed to sleep on, and enough money to get through whatever the student loans won’t cover. Oh and a high tech computer because you know, that’s vital to my Cyberverse life.

I know they care, because they provide these for me, and a fresh bouquet of stargazer lilies every morning as if they’re apologizing for the lack of human contact. But I’m all right. I still feel the ghost of their embraces as they check on me upon returning home.

I silently make a promise right there. Never will I be so sucked into Cyberverse that I forget my responsibilities to my family. So school always comes first, I’ll dig us up out of the pit we’re in and not look back. Maybe I’ll talk Lulu into an offline meeting after we graduate, and hang out like the sisters we’ve become, but in the real world. I want to meet her. I want to see the face behind the username. What does she look like? What does she sound like?

I glance at the odd box. It’s definitely a Digibird, it’s the right size, and I’m about to open it when Fireworks’ text comes to mind.

_ Haha. Cool. See you around, “Mizuki.” _

I shake my head. I was in the VIP section so he’d see my username, he probably thought it was funny enough to comment on. But I can’t help but think this mysterious package had something to do it. I didn’t order a frigging Digibird! Nah, I’m being paranoid. Maybe the VIP package includes a chance to win a free bird. Wait, that doesn’t increase my chances of getting a Le Dick, right? Oh my God. Now I’m scared. Okay, chill out, maybe it’s a Fireworks model as thanks for the obscene amount of money Lulu probably paid for close up spots. Then why didn’t Lulu get the free bird? Why me?

“Shut the fuck up and open your package already, Anjali,” I mutter to myself. Before I can debate with myself further, I just tear open the thing and I see a note flutter to the rug supporting my mattress, but I ignore it because it’s the only bird I truly wanted.

Twilight!

The moment our eyes meet, I feel a sense of power. Which made no sense, because she’s just an electronic toy bird. Budgie, canary, whatever. She’s a bird. Get over yourself. She doesn’t even have her batteries in yet. I hastily open her package, not bothering to salvage it. There she is, perched beautifully in a white cage with a yellow base, and lithium type batteries plus her whistle ring are included.

I nab the small tool kit I keep in my room - you never know when a hammer and screwdriver come in handy - and install her as properly as I can. The manual says she has a program to teach her songs through Cyberverse, and oddly enough, there’s a slick pretty celestial themed headset to go with her. I already have a headset. An old clunky one, so this is a wonderful blessing. It’s new and cool! I’ll be able to connect with the VR (virtual reality for the Really Old People) system better. Hahaha, simulations will be sweeter with this fancy piece of tech.

Twilight is a wireless model, so it’s easy to sync her with my computer. Immediately her program begins to download, and it’s done in seconds. Why is it such a huge file? It’s like full scale MMORPG sized! I thought this was a simple app to teach her new songs small enough for tablets and cell phones? Shrugging, I put on the new headset, and open the app. As it loads, I pick up the note.

_ For Mizuki. Quicker than a ray of light, she’s flying. _

“Say what?” Before I can ponder it further, a golden image with the Digibird logo appears on my screen.

**Thank you for your purchase of your very own Digibird! You have unlocked the only Limited Idol Digital Companion of this model. Congratulations! Welcome to a new level of Cyberverse, where all your virtual dreams can come true and you can share in the Tweet Life!**

“NO!” I shriek, but it’s too late. I’m registered. Gone is my old self as Mizuki, or even plain Anjali Sethi. Now I have a new identity, I’m …

**Good evening, Twilight!**


	3. Chapter 3

I hear someone talking. Well, two voices, actually. One is awfully familiar, and the other very vaguely like a fuzzy memory from a dream.

“You’ve got to be kidding me.” That’s the familiar one. “Bella, I told you I wanted Mizuki, not … whoever this is.”

The VR kicks in, and I find myself in a white cage with a yellow bottom. I panic for a second because that’s Twilight’s cage, and sure enough, the little Digibird is there with me, rubbing her head against my leg affectionately. I’d coo at her if I wasn’t so damn annoyed.

Light skinned hands grip my cage, and I peel myself off the yellow bottom to see. That’s just creepy, all I perceive are those hands and disembodied voices belonging to I think a man and a woman.  “Hello?” I try.

“Please tell me she can speak decent English and doesn’t use a translator.” It’s definitely a man’s voice, but not too much older than me. Wait. That tenor. That skin tone. No way. NO FRIGGING WAY.

“Fireworks?” I demand.

“That answers your question of if she can understand basic things,” went a very womanly and matronly voice.

“Who are you?” the man asked as if he were accusing me of something.

“An – I mean, Mizuki. Why am I in a cage?”

The hands gripped the cage, and Twilight poked at another Digibird – Fireworks. This could get confusing.  I catch a glimpse of the tell tale red, white, and black sports jacket. I pounce as the cage door opens, stumbling out ungraciously. A lock of dark azure floated into my field of vision, and I tug at it, wincing because it should hurt but it doesn’t. I also noticed that my hands are partly concealed by glove things not quite reaching my fingers, the same colour as my new hair apparently. Twilight chirps as another Digibird appears, hopping over yet does it so gracefully. Fairytale.

“Hmm.” A mismatched eyed, dual colour haired woman materializes. “Well that’s interesting. Fairytale was caged too, was she not?”

Fireworks spun around to face the red and purple cat eyed woman. Seriously, her face reminds me of a sleek grown cat. Her posture, tone, everything except her two toned hair (blonde and bright green) suggests a mature woman under the mask.

Hold up. “Bella?” Wasn’t that what Fireworks was muttering a moment ago? No way. That chick disappeared a long ass time ago!

She grins and swings around a sharp looking sword. “The very one. Pleased to meet you, Mizuki, although Cyberverse knows me as Gems now. D’aww, she’s beautiful, Fireworks. Give her a chance.”

Me? Beautiful?

“You.” He points his finger at me. “You were supposed to be Japanese.”

“Excuse me?” Uh no, please temper, don’t get the best of me.

“I specifically asked for you because according to the data, Japanese idols are more likely to be in style these days. Nobody indicated some Paki.”

I swear I must be popping a blood vessel. “WHAT? Look, asshole, I’m Indian, and nobody said our usernames had to stick to our ethnicity.”

He didn’t back down or rise to meet me in rage, instead he stares at me coolly. “Then where’s your bindi?”

“My … what?”

“You know, that dot on your forehead you Indians always wear.”

I’m surprised this ignorant son of a bitch even knows what a bindi is. “Not all of us do, and that went obsolete for the younger generations since we can’t even go out the fucking back door!” I thought I saw a sheen of something in his blue eyes, but it was gone too quickly.

“Oh dear, oh my,” said an androgynous voice approaching from Fairytale’s direction. Seriously is that a man or woman? A very pretty man or a somewhat masculine woman comes into view, darker in brown than me, very tall and stately, walking – sorry, gliding - like the epitome of beauty. Another person with two toned hair, this time with mint and turquoise. Dark grey eyes glittered at me. I study the person a little more closely, that person has no uh, female parts. He’s wearing a loose, very nice ice blue shirt and skinny jeans. “Did I hear someone say Mizuki?”

Fireworks glares at the other man, this one could pass as my brother to be honest, in an anime at least. “You’re familiar with her?”

The man chuckled, it made me blush. “You pay so little attention to your VIPs?”

“No offense,” but clearly Fireworks meant offense, “I don’t pay much mind to male fans past a certain age, especially ones with girly usernames. Answer me, Lulu. How do you know Mizuki?”

My brain stopped.

Lulu’s gaze slid to me, compassion in dark grey aimed at me. “That’s my BFF you’ve been alternatively hitting on and offending.” Fairytale placed a wing over Twilight, who was shivering with the force of my anger and shock. I think. Who knows with those birds? “Mizuki, honey? You all right?”

Bella giggles as Fireworks’ cheeks flush. The fuck?

“Well I guess that’s cute,” he stumbles over his words at first. “Sorry, but Cyberverse doesn’t give rainbows to arranged marriages.” His Digibird tilts her head at us.

I blushed, and Lulu and I stare at the White boy – err, man. “Who said anything about an arranged marriage?” Lulu asks gently, sounding like the concept was entirely strange to him.

“You just called her ‘honey’ like she was your wife or something. Is child marriage still a thing? Aren’t marriages predetermined for you in your culture?”

I felt really dizzy. Lulu shot me a concerned look before answering the fool. “I’d rather tame and marry you.” Fireworks went even paler, and Bella now burst into laughter. I gaped and had to sit down. Twilight hopped into my lap. “Now if you’re done with the ignorant questioning, shall we get down to business?”


	4. Chapter 4

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> “Rush” - Aly & AJ

My life is over.

You heard me. Bella or Gems or whatever name she’s going by said to me very kindly, “You are a full time idol now. Your university has been notified, and you’ve been withdrawn at Cyberverse’s request.”

Request, my ass. More like a fucking demand.

Bella – I’m just going to stick to her original name, less confusing because her Digibird is Gems – continues with, “Mizuki and Lulu, your debut concerts are in a month. I’d like for you to create your own songs independent of each other so that there’s no overlap. Normally you’d get only weeks to do this, but this is your first time.”

I’m only half listening while Lulu gives Fireworks the finger when Bella isn’t looking. My life. My aspirations, my future career, my dream to get the fuck out of Cyberverse, all gone because I went to some dumbass’ concert and that dumbass chose me.

Twilight chirps at my feet, I pick her up after the meeting. Bird-Fireworks stares at us from her master’s shoulder, giving his cheek a brush of her wing to catch his attention. I quickly look away. What is with these birds?

How the ass am I supposed to create a goddamn song from scratch?

Frustrated and pissed, I log off after our meeting is over. Then my trusty bitchy computer decides to signal that I have a message.

**Fireworks:** You all right?  
**Mizuki:** Fuck you.  
**Fireworks:** Goodnight.  
**Mizuki:** Hey wait a minute! I know nothing about songwriting!  
**Fireworks:** Smart and gorgeous Mizuki needs my help?  
**Mizuki:** Of course I need your help you asshole! I don’t do music shit!  
**Fireworks:** It all depends on the image you’re going for. Just no ethnic or Bollywood crap. This is a typical North American audience. Just remember, you don’t have to know it all before you try.  
**Mizuki:** Hey, don’t diss Bollywood, you prick.  
**Fireworks:** Do your people seriously parade down the streets and sing and dance random love songs whenever the mood strikes them?  
**Mizuki:** You have no concept of life outside your bubble of fame, it seems.  
**Fireworks:** Neither do you outside a life of school. Goddamnit what does that fairy Lulu want now? Look, I’ll compose the music. You write the lyrics and give me your vision.  
**Mizuki:** Is that allowed? What’s the catch?  
**Fireworks:** Bella doesn’t expect you two to learn enough musical theory and composition in under a month. The catch is that I may be forced to take a professional interest in either you or Lulu, and quite frankly, I’d rather do you than Lulu.

I exit the conversation.

**Fireworks:** Mizuki? Did you seriously just leave a conversation with me?

Fuck that asshole, I’m not responding. Tired from all the shock, I crawl into my bed and hope to God it’s one big nightmare. Morning greets me with a letter from my parents and my usual bouquet.

**Dearest Anjali beti,**

**We wish our heartfelt congratulations to our precious daughter. Idolhood is something many dream of, yet few ever attain it. We’re aware that you received the Twilight LIDC through no fault of your own, but just remember, take advantage of this opportunity.**

**You’ll always have our love and the stargazer lilies.**

**Love,**

**Mama and Papa**

Excuse me while I bawl.

A round of brain freeze later, I decide to go for a stroll through Cyberverse. I can only see and hear in this environment, walking through a city of shadows representing people. They can’t see my features either; we’re all anonymous shades to each other. Hitting up the subway, I take the longest line to the beach. It shouldn’t be crowded this early, and to my relief, it isn’t. I pull up my computer’s word processor, and start thinking.

A song. No, Le Dick Himself suggested I think of an image. An image. Hmm. Well I don’t want to be the cute type, but I’m no pop star. Heh, he called me gorgeous. I didn’t point it out last night, I was too busy being angry and he probably had no clue he said it, the jerk. “So this is my life now?” I wonder aloud. The secondary chorus came to me almost right away.

_Don't let nobody tell you, your life is over_   
_Be every colour that you are_   
_Into the rush now_   
_You don't have to know how  
Know it all before you try._

I can see myself against drums and electric guitars, with darkened colours surrounding me and rocking out, but not screaming into the microphone. Me, cool and sexy at the same time, singing to get my life back. To have my dreams returned to me.

_It takes you to another place_   
_Imagine everything you can._   
_All the colours start to blend  
Your system overloads again._

I must have spent hours there writing and revising, because I’m suddenly aware of my growling belly and my computer’s alarm goes off. I’m supposed to check in for idol activities in a half hour. “SHIT!” I scream, and get back to root town. I log off, wolf down my food in a way that would shame a pig, and log back in.

“Really,” chastises Lulu, “you’re pretty late, Mizuki.”

I roll my eyes at him. It’s been weird, knowing my best friend is a man. “All I had today was ice cream, rice and - “

“Ice cream? It’s still winter in the Real World,” points out Bella. I notice she’s wearing gold and green today, not too far off from her hair. She also added a big pink bow as a headpiece.

“Anyway,” I try to stop further interrogation, “my lyrics are done. You guys want to see?”

Lulu gets nuzzled by Fairytale, the two of them staring into each other’s eyes as if they’re communicating. Creepy. “I’m not done mine, and I don’t want yours to influence me. Sorry, sweetie.”

It seems we finally had Fireworks’ attention, because he addressed me next. “I thought I told you to give them to me, or were you too busy drowning yourself in ice cream?”

Shit. Bella’s mismatched eyes narrow at me. “You need to stay healthy, both mentally and physically, for this type of work. Lay off on the sweets, and exercise in a reasonable way. Drinking lots of water will help as well, and do breathing exercises.”

“Hey!” I protest. “Nobody’s taking my laddoos and barfi from me!”

“What did she just say? Barfing?” Fireworks looks utterly lost and disgusted while Lulu laughs oh so lovely. “You go bulimic, you’re going straight to a clinic, you hear me?”

“Relax,” Lulu reaches over to pat his shoulder, but he flinches and takes a step away. Lulu blinks, and rolls his silvery eyes. “Barfi is a type of Indian sweet, and so is a laddoo.”

“Does it have actual barf in it?”

I’m about to cuss him out, but Bella raises a finger to her lips to indicate silence on my part. Instead I grit my teeth and follow Asshole into a private room where several instruments are stocked. “Can’t we just use a synthesizer or a sound program?” I ask in wonder.

“Lyrics.”

Ugh. I wrote the shit but he’s the one issuing orders? I hand them over, and I swear his fingers lingered on mine for like a split second. Hey, Anjali? Stop imagining shit. I hold my breath almost too long as blue eyes fly through my file. “I’m thinking something of a rock vibe, but not hard core. Got a title for this?”

“Uh, Rushing?”

“Rush is better.”

“Whatever.”

“I’m no stylist, but you’ve got a soul hitting rock type feel here. Bella!” On cue, the cat-eyed queen pops her head in. “I’ve got ideas, but I don’t know how to suggest outfits and other things without sounding like …” he looks at me, “...a prick.”

“You were at the beach, right?” Bella questions. I gape. “All right, let’s do a mock photo shoot. It’s about sunset now, perfect for finding a private spot.” Instantly, we’re warped to the beach. The sudden change in scenery has me feeling a bit off. Instead of shadows, I can see Fireworks and Bella clearly. The sun is hanging low, giving the water a red-gold glow. “Oooh, you’re stunning, Mizuki. The light hits your golden eyes and tints that dark blue hair just perfectly! Makes your skin all warm looking, too!”

“Should I be here?” Fireworks coughs. What, all of a sudden he’s a gentleman?

Bella grins and shakes her head to signal no, but he turns his back to us anyway as Bella rummages through - how did THAT get here - a virtual wardrobe. “Most people equate exotic with sexy, and you’ve got some, girl. I’m more of the cute type myself.”

“I’m thinking bohemian rocker,” says Fireworks, still not looking as Bella makes me try on outfit after outfit. It’s exhausting, even though I know I’m actually sitting at my desk at home.

“Brilliant,” applauds Bella, and she digs into that wardrobe again. I blush.

“Too sexy!” I squeal.

Bella nods and pulls out rough dark purple short-shorts zipped all the way down, a translucent light blue cardigan etched with Eastern designs and tassels hanging from the bottom edge, along with gold chandelier earrings and thick gold bangles. My hair’s in two low braided pigtails.

“Oh …” I gasp as I look at my avatar. Damn, I could make a boy’s nose bleed. My teal bikini is partially covered, but I think it looks great.

“Verdict?” Bella calls out Fireworks. I clench my jaw momentarily as his eyes widen, and relax when he gives a cheeky smile.

“Approved.”


	5. Chapter 5

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> “Jump” - Madonna

Why am I here again?

I had no idea that Fireworks was busy composing music for my debut single AND preparing another song of his own. Lulu lets out a scream as we’re up close by the stage again. Nobody knows yet that Lulu and Mizuki are the hotly anticipated Fairytale and Twilight. I don’t even receive private messages from classmates anymore. It’s all been blocked. They probably think I disappeared off the face of Earth. Only communication between idols (apparently only three of us are legitimate), whatever Bella is - our instructor, I guess - and the Cyberverse system administrator are permitted past my new filter.

Anyway, this was Bella’s idea. She figures that this time at Fireworks’ concert, Lulu and I are to study. Ugh. I wish I could go back to the old me and just enjoy and squeal and have fun dreams of who I thought Fireworks was. Reality is a cold slap in the face. Yeah, even virtual ones.

 _There's only so much you can learn in one place  
_ _The more that I wait, the more time that I waste_

Huh? He talked rather sang that part, well a mix of the two, and goddamn is it sexy. No girl, pay attention to the man at hand, not his words! It’s hard not to though, especially after trying to write lyrics myself. It’s weird, his songs are so well, smooth and happy, but the lyrics aren’t something a little kid would adore. Still, he manages to pack meaning into words that people gloss over, and it works, people are clapping along to the beat.

_I'm going down my road and I can make it alone_

See what I mean? The song just feels so good, and you’re tempted to ignore what he’s saying. But what IS he trying to say? I feel so transparent, my lyrics are pretty damn obvious. I can’t help it, I’m drawn in, I can’t focus on the staging and props and other shit. He’s good. No wonder he’s the top idol of Cyberverse.

I try to think of the previous single he released, ‘Ray of Light.’ That was a cheery song too, but I got a totally different vibe from it than Lulu, who’s also clapping along. I can’t tell if she - I mean he - is dancing, who knows where the real Lulu lives. And to think I wanted to meet Lulu in real life. I’m wondering if that’s such a good idea. That was back when I assumed he was a she. Suddenly I feel a bit uncomfortable, but I push that down. Lulu has been my bestie for ages. Not once did I ask him if he was a girl - I just automatically assumed things.

 _Life's gonna drop you down like the limbs from a tree  
_ _It sways and it swings and it bends until it makes you see_

Life really has dropped me down. Thanks a lot, you hot, racist, ignorant asshole. I realize I’m going on the defensive again. But I ponder these two lines as he launches into the chorus again. The limbs of the tree aren’t snapping or breaking, they’re bending. Isn’t that the old adage, it’s better to bend with the wind instead of resisting and snapping?

Fuck my life, I’ve gone poetic.

Make me see what, though?

Then I think I get it. I’ve been resisting this entire time, except that one time at the beach where Bella was making me try on so many freaking outfits.

There’s a smaller shadow near to me, I see the username ‘Nikita’ hovering above it. That’s a pretty name, where have I heard it before? Oh! That really old television series in French. It makes me pause for a second. Will I ever be able to use French beyond Cyberverse? I can feel the candle in me flicker uncertainly.

_Don’t ever look back, oh baby_

Nikita’s actually quiet. I hear no sound coming from him or her - only God knows what a person’s sex is these days after the Lulu Incident - which is very strange. If she’s so tiny, then wouldn’t she be a child? I’m just going to assume a person that small would be cisgendered. Probably ignorant of me, but oh well. Bite me. I can’t wrap my mind around all this shit right now.

Wouldn’t your regular kid be ecstatic about such closeness to the famous Fireworks?

I stop paying attention to Fireworks at this point, openly staring at Nikita. The shade shifts, and I hope she’s not running to Daddy screaming about some Mizuki creeper watching her. Well, I suppose Cyberverse would protect me? Hahaha then it’d be good for something at least. I’m an idol, bitches.

A smile creeps on my face. I just referred to myself as an idol. This is my life now, and I can’t exactly run from the system. I’ll make the best of it somehow. “You’re not on your own,” I whisper to myself. “You, Lulu, Fireworks, heck even Bella, we’ll get out.” I may be sucked into the world of computers, but that doesn’t mean I go down like a sheep to the slaughter. The Real World is so close, yet so far away, like a mirage in a scorching desert. I can feel my inner light blaze again, and not even Fireworks’ next words can quench that now.

_I can make it alone, I can make it alone_

I’m ready.

Twilight, ever present and ever confusing, nuzzles my neck. Nikita moves nearer, I take a step back. Her utterance completely floors me. “Interesting,” she says. Not in a high pitched girly voice, but one not too far off from Bella. Does Bella have two usernames? Is that even legal?

“You can see…?” I cut myself off, not wanting to divulge too much to a total stranger.

“Twilight of the Limited Idol Digital Companion series, Special Class. So that’s where you went,” Nikita continues. My jaw drops. The shadow spins for a few seconds, then she addresses me again. “Tell no one of this, Mizuki. This is a warning, Anjali Sethi.” Then she logs out. The fuck? Who does this little princess think she is?

I panic. How does she know my real name? How could she see my bird?

++++

Lulu has an uncanny ability to know something’s up. I mean, I knew that already after years of accompanying her - goddamnit, him - online. Then again, I did speak minimally after the group meeting besides a request to Fireworks if I could revise my lyrics.

 **Lulu:** Hun, you okay?  
**Mizuki:** Yeah, I’m cool, Lu. Just been thinking.  
**Lulu:** You want to hang at the bar?  
**Mizuki:** You can’t get drunk over virtual alcohol.  
**Lulu:** We can roleplay it like usual.  
**Mizuki:** Don’t you have a song to finish? ARE YOU PROCRASTINATING AGAIN?

I don’t know, people. Roleplay drunkenness with a chick turned dude?

 **Lulu:** Do I make you nervous?

How the FUCK am I supposed to interpret THAT?

 **Mizuki:** No offense, seriously no offense, but I’m still a little rattled at you switching genders on me. omg please don’t be mad :(

But this is Lulu. Sweet, rainbow shitting unicorn Lulu.

 **Lulu:** Hahaha! It’s not a problem. It’s just .... we haven’t chilled, just you and me, not since the LIDC thing.  
**Mizuki:** waaaaah Lulu! Missed you too! Stupid ass Fireworks is constantly in my face about this song, and Bella has us training and in meetings all the bloody time!

There’s silence for some time.

 **Lulu:** I’ll invite Fireworks.  
**Mizuki:** dafuq?  
**Lulu:** I think he needs company other than that bird. Inviting him into our chat, you ask.  
**Mizuki:** Wait a fucking minute you -  
**Fireworks:** You two need help?  
**Mizuki:** \- goddamn PUSSY!

Dead quiet.

 **Fireworks:** I don’t do orgies, not even virtual ones.  
**Mizuki:** I was calling Lulu one, this has nothing to do with sex. Fuck!  
**Lulu:** Anyway…  
**Mizuki:** Right, so uh...the alcohol isn’t real, but um...wanna celebrate your success tonight?  
**Fireworks:** You two drink? Is that even permitted in your culture?  
**Mizuki:** I take it back. He’s going to analyze all my play against his idea of proper Indian women. And men.  
**Lulu:** Hey, Fireworks? We simply would like to hang out without Bella hovering and being focused on idol activities. We’re going to a bar and pretend to get drunk.  
**Fireworks:** Sure.  
**Mizuki:** WHAT?  
**Fireworks:** On some conditions. The first being that my username is too well known, so we’ll go to my place and chill there. Second, Bella is NOT to hear of this. If she randomly calls any of us, make up something. Don’t let her know we’re together beyond her jurisdiction. Got it?  
**Lulu:** Conflict of interest? Unprofessional relations?  
**Fireworks:** You could say that.


End file.
